We both learned that marriage is a partnership that will always need work, arguments are not always a bad thing and we can indeed have good arguments. Suppose we always worried that any arguments were bad but the DVD helped us show a lot of people do!
It highlighted the importance if the three main areas couples struggle, finance, power and communication.
It showed us genuinely that we are working well on these parts. Financial situations and power are very equally shared out amount us. We are sensible “clever planners” so thankfully the money areas of our relationship. We really work well as a team and share power, in the last page of the workbook we picked 8 of the same!!
However, one area we both wanted to work on was communication. We find that it would be our weakness as a couple. But in the DVD something that hit home with us both was, one person can say something and the other person hears something else! Also, both John and I work long and stressful jobs and sometimes can snap easily when we get home! We never identified before that that can be a result of the day in work we had!! Which was comforting, and we have promised to not start an argument with shouting… Quite first, something I need to adopt!
Also, we identified both our parents’ weaknesses to be communicating with each other so essentially like you said we can pick partners with similar subconscious. Our families thought overall we have a great long relationship so we should follow.
Affection was another area we wanted to work on, I could relate to the girl in the video course. John has a tendency to bottle up his feelings and I would automatically assume it’s me! But again it was great just to hear that this is normal, again we laughed and promised to be more open and not just keep it in. Also, the points you made about after 3 years our hormones of “love” fad… We definitely felt that, but our friendship, respect and love has allowed us to overcome the missing lust!!
Family and starting a family is important to us, we do understand that both parents making time for the child/children playing emotionally and physically, we both understand it will be hard and time-consuming and tiredness will be a massive lifestyle change! We don’t have children but when you mentioned about us teaching a child to act, rewarding both good behaviour not just always pointing out the bad! Just some good tips to take!
Finally, I loved the idea Niamh had to check in with each on the day! It is our wedding day so we should make sure to enjoy it!
We really have the patience, determination to make our relationship and marriage be long and happy!
Overall we found it really interesting, it made us talk and spend some real time listening to each other… And will be introducing the 1-minute gaze into each other’s eyes more often!
Emma & john
We found this to be very beneficial.
It covered topics thoroughly and offered some extremely helpful tips and stats from professionals. They did an awesome job of covering the conflict as well as trying to get your partners attention. They emphasize how it’s important to realize that no one is perfect and to stay mature.
Also in marriage, it is easy to blame your partner for issues you might be encountering together, but it’s extremely interesting to hear the psychiatrist say that most people’s marital issues stem from issues they had as children.
Also, it’s important to note that people tend to find spouses that are most like their parents, (both good and bad traits!). With that said, couples must be careful to make sure we aren’t focusing on the negative traits and focus on how we can improve that aspect within our current relationship.
Parents who criticize or push to overachieve leave kids with general anxiety, and can make them feel the need to overachieve in life, or think that things aren’t good enough. We feel this was a very important element.
The last video was interesting. We learned how families (in-laws) can affect your relationship with your partner and your kids. Although we are newly engaged, it’s an extremely important element to emphasize and hone in on BEFORE we have children. This was a beneficial course and loved the variety of content.
Jennifer P. von Ruden
We both learned that marriage is many things. Marriage is about compromise and putting your partner’s needs ahead of yours.
Marriage is seeing your partner as an equal and making sure that each of you has a say in what is happening in your lives. Marriage is not always going to be a picnic but you need to move through the rough times as partners. When it comes to conflict make sure that you are not saying always or never and you are not bringing up past arguments. Also, know that you need to put yourself in your partner’s shoes.
Your partner may not be in a positive mood because of something that happened at work or in their day. There are many things that also affect our marriage. For example our family and having kids. Through this all we need to always remember our love for one another and that we are both committed to our wonderful lives together.
From the very first four pages there were things we did not know about each other. We really liked that because even though we have been together for 7 years it was something new that we were learning about each other. We enjoyed the exercise in which we listed reasons we are getting married other than love. It was a challenging experience in which we highlighted our similar values, life goals and compatibility.
We also liked the deserted island exercise. It really showed us that although we picked and ranked mostly the same objects, there were a few that we talked about and got each other’s perspective on. Lastly, we liked watching the additional video because it talked about how God ties into our relationship. Our marriage is about commitment just like God is committed to us.
These exercises and videos had us talking about things that have not been said before. We talked about our parent’s relationships and our own relationships. We talked about our goals and our needs from each other. Overall, we really did learn more about each other and what our future had in store for us as a married couple.
Thank you for emailing us back! We really appreciate it!
Kayla and Justin
After completing the Mr and Mrs Quiz we were pleased to score 11 points and we learned we knew quite a bit about each other. We learned that loyalty and feeling comfortable with each other were some of the key reasons we decided on marriage as the next natural step.
We both learned that the main reason for us getting married was that we were bet to change either person because after as a team than as individuals. We realise that while we both have negative points and that we recognise this in each other we are prepared to take the rough with the smooth as we know that no-one is perfect.
Through completion of the booklet and watching course videos, we learned that honesty and open communication is very important. We both agreed that we don’t want nor expect marriage to change either person because we are marrying each other for the people we are now but are open to evolving with time. We can grow together in marriage. We learned it is extremely important to make time for each other during our busy lives.
We learned that it is vital to share responsibility and make joint decisions. We also learned it is vital to try and be supportive and understanding of each other even when there is a difference of opinion. We both felt that the other would be a good parent as we agree on how we feel we should bring them up if we are blessed in this way. We realised that it is important to find a healthy balance between spending quality time together with spending time with other family and friends.
We agreed to work together at all times on financial matters and budgeting issues. Through engagement with the course and discussion arising from that engagement we realise that while having children would be important to us but if it didn’t happen we would be open to other possibilities. Arguments don’t solve problems but only create more issues and it is preferable to have frank and open communication and mature conversations. The family relationship and dynamics between in-laws must be considered and we are lucky that both families are mutually supportive to us both. We both feel welcomed by our future parents in law.
Communication can be conveyed through body language as well as dialogue. We also learned the it is important for fathers to spend at least 1 hour with children playing daily in the formative early years as it helps children’s self-esteem and confidence.
Small and thoughtful acts of romance help keep the romance alive.
Jennifer Swail & Daniel Nixon
Firstly it was good to sit down and do something like this together.
I have to say we were quite surprised how much this course helped us.
When you first hear you have to complete a course you can question is it necessary? We learned quite a lot and really enjoyed the course. We learned that we need to discuss our money matters more often and that we can share any money worries we have together rather than one person taking it all on board and getting stressed.
We talked about our expectations, how some were maybe a little high and how we can achieve things by working together more and the importance of effective communication. We came across some issues and at first, had crosswords over them but as the course progressed we went back to these issues and re-discussed using the skills we picked up!
We would be more than happy to recommend the course as we really found it so good and has had a major benefit for us.
Edel Kennedy, Balbriggan, Co Dublin
I felt that in our own environment we were able to speak very freely about all issues addressed in the premarriage program, as opposed to discussing them with other people in the room. I learned that we as a couple are definitely on the same wavelength, the answers to most of our questions were the same, we seemed to be in agreement and understood most areas the same. I feel this justifies why we argue very rarely throughout our 12-year relationship.
The section which speaks about conflict and what you learn from your parents was for me an eye-opener. My parents do have a very strong relationship but for me to think about the arguments I have witnessed growing up and how that has influenced me was interesting to look back on. This makes me conscious of how we would interact as a couple if we are successful at having our own family.
We were late to attend Avalon course..but David recommended to order a dvd and do it at home. We found it very helpful and funny. While doing the workbooks we learned a lot about each other and discuss our future life together more serious than we did before.
We really enjoyed it!!! The best thing is that we could do it in our own time and didn’t have to rush 🙂
We recommend Avalon dvd course for every couple out there, especially for those who are too busy to attend the course themselves.
Thank You Avalon! Barbara & Robert
Thank you Avalon for creating such an inventive, affordable & time efficient way of doing a pre-marriage course. I was putting off booking a pre-marriage course because honestly I was very apprehensive at the thoughts of someone preaching to me about how to work my relationship, my marriage and my family. With work commitments and a young family getting the time off together to attend a course would be difficult. After speaking with Dave Kavanagh from Avalon he recommended the DVD pre-marriage course and well what can I say. The course is absolutely genius. We both have fun doing it and after years together we even learnt things about each other because of the workbooks. We done the course in our own time and had fun doing it. The content was down to earth, honest and current.
I cannot recommend the DVD/online course high enough. I would recommend it to everyone. Congratulations and well done Avalon.
Thanks, Hazel & Dave McCreery
Having completed the Avalon program we wanted to let you know how much we enjoyed the experience.
It was very beneficial to be able to watch a DVD in our own home. We completed the booklets before watching the DVD and the interaction with each other was very amusing and loving especially when we discussed our answers. It was nice to sit down with no distractions and we really felt a close bond with each other when the course was completed.
We would highly recommend this Avalon online marriage course and thanks for sending our certificate so promptly.
Best Wishes Keith Morrissey & Liz Kelly
“Myself and my fiance have just completed the online Avalon pre-marriage preparation course and I just wanted to thank you and say what a positive experience it has been. We were both so pleasantly surprised with how relevant, modern and comprehensive the course content was- not what we were expecting at all!
I had reservations at first about how meaningful it would be to complete an online pre-marriage course but now I actually feel it provoked a truly in-depth discussion between us as we worked through each section at our own convenience and took our time to chat about the various reflections that arose from each. The “his & her” workbooks were fantastic conversation starters!
The course has a really strong spiritual emphasis which was very important to me however, the guidance and advice from a range of experts was invaluable also. It strikes a perfect balance in preparing couples for the religious sacrament of marriage and the everyday challenges they are likely to face.
My only regret is that we did not complete the course sooner as the advice, videos and tools provided to help couples plan for a wedding would have been extremely useful in our early planning stages… particularly the budgeting tool!
I want to thank you also for how promptly you replied to any of my queries along the way. I will be recommending the Avalon pre-marriage course to any of my friends getting engaged without hesitation.”
Niamh O Donnell
“We found it extremely helpful!
The topics that were brought up for discussion were things that we didn’t realize we needed to talk about. It really helped us to understand each other better and how we can improve on working through differences. Thank you so much!”
An friend of mine in Dublin recommended the program, we had looked at trying to do the in-person one last time we were home but the timing didn’t quite work out for us. We also looked at the Canadian version but it seemed quite different and as we’re getting married in Ireland we wanted to make sure we were doing the right thing!
It’s a great program, the workbooks in particular were really helpful so we’ll definitely be recommending it to anyone over here that needs to do it!”
Thank you so much for an absolutely excellent course today in Hilton hotel. I genuinely feel more confident now more than ever to take on the role of husband.!! It’s amazing the little gems of information that can be picked up along the way and it was great to chat to several other couples in the same situation. Thank you again to David for a most informative day excellently delivered.”
Alan and Sandra.We found it good, and very useful….
During the discussion parts we really talked (and calmly!) and we listened to each other more so than any other time we had spoken about certain topics.
We knew all along that we had very very similar ideas about things but it was cemented more during the programme.
We loved that it was at home and we could speak more comfortably.
I have recommended it to a few couples. It was very good, quite interesting actually. I liked the way it had both male & female presenters. Also it came across like ye really understood the normal issues in life for a couple. We really enjoyed the work books as while the questions are not over developed they do get you talking about issues like number of children etc.
I would sincerely like to thank you for giving us the opportunity to do the course from our home and at a time that is convenient to us. With all the things that you have to do for a wedding on top of day to day life. It makes things a lot easier. After finishing our Avalon on line course we would like to thank you! It was great to be able to do it at home in our own time we also learnt a lot more about each other!!
We really enjoyed the work books it was fun to swap over our answers but also brought up a lot of discussions about our future that we never sat and talked about before!! The course has brought us closer together and confident in our relationship! We would highly recommend this course!!” We completed the course online today and the quiz.
We really enjoyed doing the course and it reaffirms our suitability and strength as a couple.
We particularly enjoyed filling out the work books and doing the exercises together.
We had attended one of their courses in the Clarion in Dublin and it was good.
In fact I would say it was very good. I had expected the premarriage courses to be an uncomfortable experience but this was really relaxed and we enjoyed it.
I would definitely recommend them.
As far as I know the same people do the courses nationwide but I couldn’t say for definite.I was the very same, dreaded the thoughts of it, but it was grand and fun at times much to my surprise . we only had to introduce ourselves we didn’t need to take part if we didn’t want to so go and enjoy your day.
Its not that bad. You get to think about things you wouldn’t ordinarily on a day to day basis. I was surprised at finding out how well me and the OH know each other.
We did one exercise during the day where we were in small groups. And its not intrusive and takes about 15 minutes. I’m the same as you I’m not into group things,